Gawd, it just seems like nothing in my life will ever get any easier for me. This move to Savusavu has just made it even more important for me to move out and find my own life, by my self and without mum and dad hanging on my shoulders. Everything I am, what I choose, and wherever I go; it’s all scrutinized by them and they just have to have a say in everything. The older I get, the more sacrifices I’m expected to make. I’m almost 25 and mum wants me to share a bedroom with Navi. I’m sorry, I love my family and all my cousins but there is no way in hell that I will share my personal space with them. She of all people should know that. Well, she’ll see for herself just how stubborn I can be. Then there’s dad. Always has an excuse for everything.
The arrangements for a new house should have been made by now, but he’s busy playing host to every Tom, Dick and Harry that comes through here. I want us to get to a cleaner, healthier house; I want my own space; I want this bloody computer to be fixed up so I can watch my movies in the privacy of my bedroom. I want my own things.
I can’t keep expecting to sacrifice my life so that theirs is a little less hassled. Fuck that shit!
If I get into the Oxfam program, I’m gonna learn everything I can; get all the accreditation I can achieve from it and get a good job, with a good pay and flat out. I need to have this for myself or I will die bitter and unsatisfied.
I won’t put up with this anymore! If things don’t start moving faster, I’m not gonna help with any sermons, meeting plan prep, and singing – NOTHING! I will draw the line as to where I fit in this scheme of things. I will not be made a fool of in my own life.
So there.
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